Thursday, September 4, 2008

Election Night Result Exclamations of the McCain Supporter

On Losing:

• “I’m so angry I could punch an immigrant baby!”

• “How could we fail Saudi Arabia so?!”

• “When will these earthlings realize that caring for your fellow man is but a sign of weakness?”

• “See what happens when you continue to fund education?”

• “It’s just as they predicted in ‘Revelations: The Wal-Mart Edition’!”

• “They can’t take office if there’s no United States to lead.”

• “Tell Fox News they can change their name back to The German Workers Party Network.”

• “Next time we attack them in their dreams.”

• “Well, this is why we have a military. Secure the capital.”

• “Alert Mordor!”

On Winning:

• “Finally, now we can get to work on that death ray.”

• “Ahhh, another four years to get Jesus on some currency.”

• “Well, now that the election’s over we can release the blacks and women.”

• “Award the NRA ten Senate seats.”

• “At least we’ll never have to bother with another election again.”

• “If only they knew how close we were to releasing small pox.”

• “Back to fighting Oceania…or was it Eurasia?”

• “Next order of business, deciding on a citizen uniform.”


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