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- Francesco Marciuliano
- New York, NY, United Arab Emirates
- Pens the comic strips Sally Forth and Medium Large. Writes for The Onion News Network. Serves as head writer for the PBS series SeeMore's Playhouse (for which his script won two regional Emmys). Was afraid of the color yellow until about age nine. Tans a little too well to be trusted by security.
Comics Kingdom
Blog Mission Statement
A simple grilled cheese sandwich. Something that can be procured anywhere at any time. Nothing too exciting, right?
But what if I put a little butter on the bread before I grilled that sandwich? That would add a little extra zing, right? And what if instead of using plain old American cheese I opted for something a tad more exotic, like Camembert, Stilton or Roquefort? Now we're talking, right?
And what if instead of using bread for my grilled cheese sandwich I used two large blocks of pure platinum? And what if instead of eating the platinum I sold it and then used that small fortune as venture capital for a Beijing-based conglomerate that could take advantage of Chinese local business incentives, cheap labor, lax environmental laws and surging global interest in the fastest-growing economy in the world, thereby ensuring returns in the billions of dollars even in the face of a collapsing U.S. dollar and a massive industrial shift from the technical to service business sector? Wouldn't that be nice?
That's exactly what Francesco Explains It All is. In an endless buffet of indistinguishable tastes, it's the grilled platinum Stilton cheese sandwich that could forever destabilize geoeconomics. Care for a bite?
But what if I put a little butter on the bread before I grilled that sandwich? That would add a little extra zing, right? And what if instead of using plain old American cheese I opted for something a tad more exotic, like Camembert, Stilton or Roquefort? Now we're talking, right?
And what if instead of using bread for my grilled cheese sandwich I used two large blocks of pure platinum? And what if instead of eating the platinum I sold it and then used that small fortune as venture capital for a Beijing-based conglomerate that could take advantage of Chinese local business incentives, cheap labor, lax environmental laws and surging global interest in the fastest-growing economy in the world, thereby ensuring returns in the billions of dollars even in the face of a collapsing U.S. dollar and a massive industrial shift from the technical to service business sector? Wouldn't that be nice?
That's exactly what Francesco Explains It All is. In an endless buffet of indistinguishable tastes, it's the grilled platinum Stilton cheese sandwich that could forever destabilize geoeconomics. Care for a bite?
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3 comments:
So all a molten icecap would do is flood out some red states? What's wrong with that?
Speaking as an Arkansan ("Constitutionally OK With Desegregation Since 1990") I can tell you that if we red states are flooded, we're not going to just stay there and drown. Oh no. We're going to come to YOUR state. We're going to open bait shops and talk about duck hunting and get Larry the Cable Guy routines on the radio.
And we'll need a place to live, and we'll say, "We're defending this country, so you better let us stay in your house," and you'll be all, "The Third Amendment says I don't have to quarter you," and we'll be all, "The Second Amendment's about to make the Third Amendment crap its pants." Then we'll pull out our hunting rifle (which we call "Charlene") and force you to let us move in. You'd better learn to like venison jerky, cause we're gonna be skinnin' some deer in the garage.
Still OK with global warming?
I'm in Texas - I'll be swimming right behind you.
What I found amusing about that clip is that the SE U.S. gets inundated while Cuba and the Mexican Gulf Coast- not to mention places like the future Bangladesh, big chunks of Africa, Europe, most islands, etc., etc., are too insignificant to be mentioned.
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