Friday, April 30, 2010

Wedding Invitation Warning Signs

"The bride and groom have written their own slam poetry."

"Be prepared for vigorous political discourse."

"As lifelong fans of “Space: 1999,” the couple…"

"Once the blaze has been extinguished, the ceremony will commence."

"Please, Daniel, don’t make a scene."

"Furries will be seated to the left, non-furries to the right."

"We invite each of you to bring a carousel of slides."

"While we have nothing against the Jews per se…"

"If anyone sees Janet tell her to meet me at the altar by 4."

"Arrive early with work boots, a hammer and a can-do spirit!"

"And on the mouth-harp…"

"Okay, we totally spaced on the food."

"Do not directly address the druids."

"The following event may be too intense for the young and easily frightened."

"We’re not in the mood for any shit, got it?"

"Please abstain from liquor or dancing."

"Do not block the skeeball machines."

"This time we mean it."

5 comments:

markanthonyramirez said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA Ces, you never cease to make me laugh or amaze me!

Tom said...

Ha! My wife was involved in a rather conservative church at the time, and we actually had to deal with the "alcohol and dancing" thing. We had it, of course, but there was a bit of grumbling from certain sectors. Those sectors are no longer heard from. :)

Andrea said...

"Once the blaze has been extinguished, the ceremony will commence."

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I would love that wedding!

Dan said...

Those would all be awesome wedding ceremonies.

Rantz said...

I particularly like "Furries will be seated to the left, non-furries to the right."