Wednesday, September 9, 2009
School Days, School Days...
Over the years Hilary has viewed the start of the new school term with great trepidation. Sometimes she's cautiously hoped for a year full of achievement and jubilation. Other times she's approached the endeavor with a glum mien and a feeling of impending sorrow. (However--for those who have recently questioned such--she's always begun school the day after Labor Day, just like many schools in the my beloved Northeast.)
Many of Hilary's fears in the strips mirror those I had throughout public school. Being an extremely shy kid, I approached each new year as French royalty would approach the guillotine, with a similar sense of fate but without the farthingale and lead-based facial powder. That shyness has ebbed noticeably over the years but has still proven a great stumbling block personally and professionally well into adulthood. Opportunities have been lost and relationships have ended because of a lack of confidence not only in my abilities but also my worthiness as a person.
Lately I've take a far more active approach to my reticence and timidity, through therapy and significant changes in my social demeanor and approach. While I'm very proud of what I've accomplished in the past few months I also know I can't rest on such improvements, both for my own good as for those I truly care about. I must continue to directly face and wrestle with my shyness if I'm ever to have a chance at a happy, fulfilling life.
I'm not quite certain how today's strip about the first day of school led to such ruminations. Maybe I see Hil's more reasonable outlook as an encouraging statement of my own. All I know is that it felt right--perhaps even emboldening--to express those thoughts here. After all, not every blog post can be about 70's sitcoms and failed Onion submissions, can they?