Tuesday, October 21, 2008

What Does Faye Want to Discuss with Sally?


"Listen, Mrs. Forth, your daughter and I have become more than just friends. We've become a particularly thorny issue for a family-oriented comic strip"

"Well, my rumspringa is at an end. Time for this girl to get back to Amish Country."

"I saw your husband sob uncontrollably while watching How to Look Good Naked."

"Why are you, Hilary and Ted apparently the only people around here with last names?"

"If we were The Golden Girls I'd be Dorothy, Hil would be Rose, you'd be Sophia and Ted would be that live-in gay housekeeper character they cut after the pilot episode."*

"Okay, first the good news--you were right. Hil and I shouldn't have been playing 'Hide Behind the Gas Pumps while Shooting Flaming Arrows at Each Other'..."

“I despise everything that your family represents. But I love your stocked fridge and indoor plumbing. So clearly I’m torn.”

"I know about your past life playing a naked sexpot for U.S. servicemen. Now let's talk blackmail..." *

"I realize that I may come around here far more often than you would like. But you have to understand, you don't have a choice. Your house wants me here."

"Hilary and I have formed an intense psychological bond involving an elaborate fantasy world of our making called 'Forth World,' a constant correspondence written in the form of a royal couple and, well, if you've guessed what film I'm referring to by now then you know this is the part where I bash your head in with a brick." *

7 comments:

ParallaxG said...

"Sally, I am the younger version of you from an alternate timeline. I could say that I came to warn you of a terrible threat to humanity, but I really came just to mess with your head and try to out-smirk you.

Sara Benincasa said...

"Sally, I eat lots of pussy."

I mean, really. Let's dispense with the pageantry and get down to the truth.

PlaidPhantom said...

"I'm hosting a Tupperware party this evening, and I'd like you to come."

Hey, no one would expect it.

Dag said...

"Sally, did you ever see Rosemary's Baby?"

Dimestore Lipstick said...

Damn you to HELL for that Golden Girls wiki link.

Linda said...

I definitely get the Heavenly Creatures vibe from those two. And why if Faye is poorer does she dress better than Hil and have a non-Supercuts hairstyle?

yellojkt said...

I called the more than friends development a long time ago. Of course the posters of Rosie O'Donnell and Ellen Degeneres in Faye's room were the first clue. Or was that Opus? They look so alike.