"Everyone I told about the cover-up is dead! My supervisor, my wife, my parents, my pharmacist, my mailman, the guy at the deli, the lady who sells me my morning coffee, some woman who was just asking me for directions, that second grade class I chaperoned to the zoo. God, why can’t I ever keep my mouth shut?!?"
"Squash, zucchini, I don’t care what you call it. Either way, it has a gun."
"Artificial intelligence seemed like such a boon to both science and mankind. But then the robots discovered self-pity."
"I have come to your planet to decry man’s foul deeds! Man has destroyed his environment! Man has destroyed his fellow man! Man has destroyed everything and everyone he claims ever to have held dear! That’s why I’m all about the ladies…"
"With a little encouragement and a lot of training that terrier may just take this team to the Super Bowl."
"Maybe you did kill your twin brother. Or maybe you just got confused and stabbed yourself to death instead."
"What do you mean the rabbits have controlling interest of the company?!?"
"We can’t give up now! Not this late in the game! If we give up now we’ll never be known as anything but quitters! You hear me? Quitters!…Oh, and we’ll also be enslaved for all eternity."
"We put a lot on the line to get here, Jenkins. Family, careers, everything. But if this final experiment works as well as I think it will, well then it looks like Mentos is going to have some pretty stiff competition come the fall."
"Of course the aliens knew we were attacking! Why do you think they refused to open the door?!"
"The fate of four billion people and the planet Earth now rests in your hands. Call me when you get this message."
"I know it’s been years but to this day everywhere I go I can still hear her name—‘The.’"
"Okay, I’ll lift the curse. But next time don’t try to pass off Pepsi as Coke."
"Well, it’s down to just you and me, Rodrigo. Mano a mano, just like we always knew it would be. But let me you ask you something, friend. Let me ask you just one thing. Do you really think you have what it takes to go all the way? Do you?! Because I just scored "foursies" and unless you can top that the jacks championship will be all mine."
"Ancient legends say that he who first discovers the lost riches of the kings will be almost impossible to deal with afterwards."
"She broke my heart. First with her cruelty and then with her broadsword."
"Quick, everyone! Out of the water! Now! It’s a private beach."
"The terrorists said that if we don’t give in to all of their demands they will blow up Los Angeles. Frankly, I’m torn."
"The most important thing in the world is to be loved…by millions…of paying customers."
"They say he was a sexual predator. But I’ll always remember him as just a horny mountain lion."
"And thanks to Wal-Mart’s low prices and great selection we’ll all be armed in time for the invasion!"
"Do you want to see the youth center close down forever? Or do you want to join us and help raise the necessary funds by producing the best low-budget, highly lucrative porn films for the direct-to-video market ever?!"
"I’m afraid there is now no way back to your dimension. But why would you wish to leave here, to leave paradise, where your every need is met, your every desire is fulfilled and your every orifice is examined hourly for exploding spores?"
"Guess the experts were right. Some things were just never meant to have horns fused onto them."
"Life is funny. But you know what’s funnier? Comedy."
"Only one man can defeat a monster like that. Unfortunately, we’re simply not budgeted for his services."
"I don’t like you and you don’t like me. But unless we overcome our differences and work as a team there is no way we will ever win at doubles tennis."
"Looking back, it was foolish of us to teach the apes both advanced weaponry and parliamentary procedure."
1 comment:
what movies are these quotes from?
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