You know, I'm still pissed that my Evel Knievel didn't come with the damned Swagger Stick shown in the third commercial and pictured in loving detail in the ads in my comic books. Also, my house didn't have any 100' straightaways in it, so my brother and I had to be content with sending the bikes zipping across the kitchen to snash into the oven. And that was IF you could keep the stupid motorcycle from falling over - notice that the bike is never seen upright in a single shot for more than a few seconds. In the end we realized that it worked much better if you left off the stupid Gumby-armed doll, which was much smaller than our G.I. Joes and even our Action Jacksons and therefore looked puny and weak.
Pens the comic strips Sally Forth and Medium Large. Writes for The Onion News Network. Serves as head writer for the PBS series SeeMore's Playhouse (for which his script won two regional Emmys). Was afraid of the color yellow until about age nine. Tans a little too well to be trusted by security.
A simple grilled cheese sandwich. Something that can be procured anywhere at any time. Nothing too exciting, right?
But what if I put a little butter on the bread before I grilled that sandwich? That would add a little extra zing, right? And what if instead of using plain old American cheese I opted for something a tad more exotic, like Camembert, Stilton or Roquefort? Now we're talking, right?
And what if instead of using bread for my grilled cheese sandwich I used two large blocks of pure platinum? And what if instead of eating the platinum I sold it and then used that small fortune as venture capital for a Beijing-based conglomerate that could take advantage of Chinese local business incentives, cheap labor, lax environmental laws and surging global interest in the fastest-growing economy in the world, thereby ensuring returns in the billions of dollars even in the face of a collapsing U.S. dollar and a massive industrial shift from the technical to service business sector? Wouldn't that be nice?
That's exactly what Francesco Explains It All is. In an endless buffet of indistinguishable tastes, it's the grilled platinum Stilton cheese sandwich that could forever destabilize geoeconomics. Care for a bite?
2 comments:
You know, I'm still pissed that my Evel Knievel didn't come with the damned Swagger Stick shown in the third commercial and pictured in loving detail in the ads in my comic books. Also, my house didn't have any 100' straightaways in it, so my brother and I had to be content with sending the bikes zipping across the kitchen to snash into the oven. And that was IF you could keep the stupid motorcycle from falling over - notice that the bike is never seen upright in a single shot for more than a few seconds. In the end we realized that it worked much better if you left off the stupid Gumby-armed doll, which was much smaller than our G.I. Joes and even our Action Jacksons and therefore looked puny and weak.
You know, I didn't even officially know he was dead until this morning...your site is now my major source for news and information!
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